Sibonelesihle Shabalala
One too many…
Among the various purposes of alcohol consumption, it is perceived by many as a means of celebrating certain events. However, one should be careful and make a clear distinction between consuming it to celebrate, and consuming it at no particular occasion with the mere intention of getting drunk.
2005 would be ”just another year”, I thought. Nothing would set it apart from previous years. Little did I know that it would turn out to be the year of my venturing into a road better left not traveled; an unforgiving road with far more paths leading into it than those leading out. Little did I know that my first sip of that bitter-sweet concoction otherwise known as beer, would serve as a precursor to my degenerating into an alcoholic.
I loved alcohol. It made me happy. It aroused in me a zest for life which, in my sober state, remained dormant. Once drunk, my inhibitions were released and it was then that I truly got to live out my wildest dreams. It was all fun and games-literally. Escaping had never felt so good!
The worst thing about intoxication is its deceitful quality. I soon believed that alcohol fostered self-confidence, which I did not have in me while sober. I no longer felt normal without it. This dependence, coupled with various instances of irresponsible behavior under the influence, resulted in my loss of self-respect. Quitting was the only way of regaining it, but this proved easier said than done.
It is often said that the mind is a powerful tool with which any challenge can be overcome. With a degree of cynicism, I applied this concept to my attempt at kicking the habit. My reasoning as far as alcohol consumption was concerned, changed profoundly. Although scientifically not a drug, I conditioned my mind to perceive alcohol as such, seeing as the consumption of both substances engenders a certain loss of control. I, on the other hand, chose to remain in control. I chose to establish my center, and to ensure that it constantly maintains hold. Furthermore, my reasoning brought me to the conclusion that gratification, based on the effect of a stimulant, cannot be worth pursuing if the effect puts, not only your health at risk, but also carries the risk of tainting your self-image as well as the image which you project to the world. It is simply too high a price to pay for making the mistake of over-indulging.
Changing my mind-set was therefore all I needed to do in order to stop drinking, and
STOP, I did!
Although a good decision, I did expect some repercussions to arise. I expected to stick out like a sore thumb in the company of my friends as I would no longer take part in their binging sessions. Socializing would present an awkwardness born out of the absence of intoxication-induced bravado. However, the unexpected happened; not only did I socialize with the most natural of ease, but I exuded confidence in doing so. I was friendlier. I was compassionate. Most of all, I was sincere. This new positive energy saw me befriending people whom I had previously sneered at as I thought that they would “cramp my style”. My new attitude allowed me to keep an open mind and not to be quick to judge others prior to getting to know them better. Establishing understanding paves the way towards tolerance, which in turn allows for the growth of mutual relationships of character-building.
Setting out to achieve a goal is one thing. Applying your mind in doing so is quite another. This was evident in my breaking away from alcohol abuse. What I had previously thought of as being a mere notion actually turned out to be a fact: you can do anything you put your mind to. Decisiveness also plays a major role. Although cynical in the beginning, I was never hesitant in quitting; this would only have impeded my progress.
I may be no saint, but I am definitely a better person than I was before I stopped drinking. Seeing the world through the bottom of a beer bottle only provides diminished and distorted images of what really lies out there.
